Cute Animals - Tumblr Posts
I am cackling over this
Please donate to them I would but sadly i’s broke so unfortunately cannot feed these hilarious dogo s
So the tire-eating potholes in my neighborhood finally killed both my rear tires and I had to get that dealt with, but while they were getting replaced, I put the dogs in puppy daycare and upon picking them up early, the attendant literally sprinted to the front desk, grabbed me by the shoulders and breathlessly exclaimed "YOUNEEDTOCOMESEEWHATYOURDOGSAREDOING"
While she escorted me back to the play yards, she explained that every time they have more than three Corgi, they have to put all the Corgs in a separate play yard because they turn into a little gang and bully the Very Large dogs by playing Cow Herding Simulator 5000 with them, and especially if Herschel is there, because corgis are bossy-pants dogs, and Herschel has the bossiest pants of them all and acts as leader.
Despite being a little Don Corgleone to the short bitch mafia, Hershcel is also a Huge Baby and will apparently cry and cry and try to climb the fence and cry and eat people's shoelaces and cry if he is separated from Charlie during playtime, so this means any time that "Corgi Party" is happening, Charlie also has to go to Corgi party, despite being full-height, running cat software and a senior citizen. he copes with being Gulliver amongst the Liliputians by climbing onto the roof of the playskool castle they have for a climbing structure in the yard, kicking the ladder down behind him, and stretching out to nap in the sun while the corgi frolic and gambol around him.
Corgi are dogs that make up and play games with secret rules, like kindergartners. "Everyone bark in sync" is a popular game, as is "follow the leader" and it's companion game "March in a circle around a tall structure like ants caught in a death loop".
So what I was greeted with, when the attendant and I snuck out to the play yard, was the sight of Charlie, sound asleep and flat on his back with his paws crossed over his chest because sighthounds sleep in the stupidest fucking positions, on top of a faux-medieval castle with gargoyles on the corners, surrounded by approximately seven Corgi, all trotting in a circle around him, barking in sync.
"They look like they're preforming some kind of ritual!" giggled the attendant as attempted to get my phone to focus.
"Yeah, they're gonna summon Corgtulhu." I said.
Unfortunately, this made the attendant literally fall on her ass laughing, and distracted Herschel and his compatriots, so they didn't get to complete the summons, and I didn't get the pic.
The attendant kept laughing because apparently she's new to puns, and had mostly gotten it under control by the time we got everyone's leashes on and back out to the front.
The manager was watching the front desk, bemused. Did you get to see them doing the ritual?"
"YEAH!" shrieks the attendant, still excitable with merriment. "THEY'RE- THEY WERE-" The attendant ends up giggling on the floor.
"You okay there Katie?" asked the manager with minimal concern.
"We think they were trying to summon Corgthulhu." I eplain, and Katie screams from the floor. "Wasn't gonna work though, you need a virgin sacrifice and Charlie had an STD when we got him."
It was the manager's turn to shriek. and for Charlie and Herschel to start barking in solidarity.
"That's right Charlie! Your sluttiness saved the world!" I told him, as he jumped up and kicked me in the face.
Anyway, that's why Charlie's nickname at daycare is now "Superman(whore)"
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If you found this story amusing, please consider donating to my Ko-fi or pre-ordering the Family Lore book on my Patreon so I can buy the good dogs more treats.
Holstein Friesian Dairy Cow (Bos taurus taurus), Nebraska, 2020, Jey Schroeder
Egyptian Fruit Bat (Rousettus aegyptiacus), Omaha Henry Doorly Zoo & Aquarium, 2020, Jey Schroeder
Northern Painted Turtle (Chrysemys picta), 2022, Lee G. Simmons Wildlife Safari Park, Jey Schroeder
Common Squirrel Monkey (Saimiri sciureus), 2022, Omaha Henry Doorly Zoo, Jey Schroeder
Burrowing Owl (Athene cunicularia), 2022, Omaha Henry Doorly Zoo, Jey Schroeder
Yellow-Billed Duck (Anas undulata), 2022, Omaha Henry Doorly Zoo, Jey Schroeder
Female Black Howler Monkey (Alouatta caraya), 2022, Omaha Henry Doorly Zoo, Jey Schroeder
the Bluejay and the Bee, Jey Schroeder 2022
Fox squirrel in spring, Jey Schroeder, 2022
Sea lion, Omaha Henry Doorly Zoo & Aquarium, Jey Schroeder, 2022
Common eastern bumblebee, Jey Schroeder, 2022
Bull Elk blep, Jey Schroeder, 2023
lil dude, treat them well <3
“Tiny paws leave the biggest imprints on hearts.”
this is my child and i would die for her
LOOK AT MY LIL CHUNKY GIRL SHE'S SOOOO CUTE 😖💕💕💗
Book Recommendations <3
So this book is an historical romance and mystery novel with a strong female main character, and if you want more book boyfriends and girlfriends to add to your collection then you need to read it and share who your newest obsession is.
There are bushrangers, a murder mystery, a slow burn love story, and heaps of suspense.
It's called Among The Grey Gums and it's by an Australian author that is probably one of the sweetest people you'll ever meet (my favourite non-biological family member).
Unfortunately the book hasn't sold enough copies yet and she now has to look for a new publisher, if you are interested in the genre and want to support a small author I urge you to buy a copy of her works. Among The Grey Gums is her second book and it has gotten me into the Historical fiction genre.
PS. There's no spicy scenes :)
PSPS. Here's where to get the audiobook (there's a huge sale at the moment): https://amzn.asia/d/3deqWvE
Edit: I forgot to mention - there's an adult puppy
